An Act of Defiance

daughter of thunder · An Act of Defiance

The moral decay of man 

Lurch forward 

putrid breath hot on the slick of my neck

Rumor has it—  if you peer into its one gunky eye for

more than eight seconds 

Disillusionment will strike fangs to the jugular before you can bat a lash 

(the veil lifts 

again

and again

And)

Come dawn 

every. morning.

there are horrors anew.

In the same palette where 108 shades of ruby 

Intimate the intimate journey of life receding from the aorta

I see only amaryllis and mums bubbling forth 

loud and 

very much alive

A whole field of them waving their bright bulbous arms

At the homicide, the herbicide and the other side alike

In spite of that which seeks to sap succor from the sinews

They wave,

(Again 

And again)

Smiling even,

In warm welcome

of all who defy what is seen for what is really there.

1 Timothy 6:19

Two Truths and A Lie

daughter of thunder · Two Truths and a Lie

Irony is how desperately one human needs to know another 

that he is dizzy spinning stories:

1. The whole earth could be a gleaming sphere of Jupiter moon
    lit by the speed of Saturnic cyclones
2. I knew truth before I could see him 
3. And when finally I could see him
    he flickered like wire burnt and dissipated 

Did you spot the lie the earth could never tell?

The trick is to try and focus on what cannot be seen;

dig out all the holes of context fuzzy

and waiting for you:

1. Look again at the earth.
   This time it is the mottled photograph
    buried beneath your sock drawer
   of the people you need the most
2. Good and evil were born entirely from the heart of man 
3. The heart of man is held captive by the fate of his own hands

Everyone knows the human heart cannot be morassed by morality 

Last one, are you ready?

1. Take a magnifying glass
    to the home of a billion bleeding creatures
    all of them motivated by an internal tick and
2. You can see the microscope cannot lie:
    they each sigh according to a hum drum resounding 
3. One voice is not enough,
   but it is the choir that reigns victorious 

Of course one voice is enough.
Your one small voice is more powerful an army
 than all the galaxies combined.

about: perception matters, but so does the objective truth

What it Never Was

daughter of thunder · What It Never Was

The answer was always no

Was never any wriggling our way into an alternate reality 

Or

Could I for five minutes 

Just five uninterrupted moments

Mend the mortal grief that confronts my every thought?

No.

I fear that if I cannot accept it,

Am I really any better than the men who raped me?

No.

I am all out of your favorite shade 

trying to maneuver a mango gold into a searing red

Of well if everyone is calling the peach a gooseberry 

Whose to say it isn’t at least a bit sour?

No, and shut down the gaslight on your way out.

No, who once tried to inch its way toward a 

sorta-kinda-maybe (?)

But collapsed before the presence of prophecy

No is exactly what it looks like.

I am exactly what I look like.

Bombs May Fall.

That which is longing to kill me may well have her day in court.

The mere state of my silver sliver is not

what is being balanced on the scales of time and reason.

Speak your truth;

But should that two-lettered brute 

Happen to pry the way out its jawbone jailhouse,

To try and train it, already born, bourne 

and on its way to ruin?

To conquer its fate now is too tenuous a task

that only time could possibly tell.

about// The worst sort of liars are the ones lying to themselves

The Apple Tree

daughter of thunder · The Apple Tree

 Foremost, the hunger.

So the fruit juice driveled down while the seed was swallowed whole

Could feel it germinate a warm hum against my kidney

fibrous arms wrapped tendrils around the loops of each bowel

Boy or bosc? Pear, clementine or a sweet baby girl?

I baked round basking in the morning glory.

The waiting, that delicious want

Womb expanding with wonder

To try and escape the grit now? Mud brown 

bittersweet the core bore

Chromosomes neat and tucked 

between bits of bark in the teeth

Why even bother?

Just like his father before him

I close my eyes,

Dream of the orchard at my feet

Who else could I ever be?

about// because the apple cannot fall from the tree

Know Your Place

daughter of thunder · Know Your Place

I walk around with a jambya lodged 

Between the 11th and 12th vertebrae

Just

Floating there

Really

Curious how it curves just so

One might believe it has always been there

Do not lie on my grave

 and tell them it has always been there 

I beg of you—

Remember:

If there are angels watching over us,

There must too be demons.

We imagine them bull-horned and lurking 

But you have only to glance around to see

we are surrounded by darkness.

They would like to spook us.

But if there are demons recreating with marionettes,

There must too be angels.

And what really is a cheap dagger

next to the sword of my King?

Revelation 19:15

A Formal Apology to the Forest Birds

daughter of thunder · A Formal Apology to the Forest Birds

After Robert Frost

Eagerly

That is how the enemy anticipates our downfall 

In the same manner the sky fell rain

(Or men fell trees)

like always a punctured lung 

with the water seeping in

Eager tentacles bent on canoodling into my every cranny

with sole intentions of utter annihilation.

Who would have thought all of that misery could

 squeeze in so narrow a heartspace?

 

Although…

We bore witness Bobby kneeling in the garden bed;

didn’t stand a chance against so ruthless an adversary

as bullet sharp wind--

lodged but not dead.

Well,

We all saw it and said nothing

Just as I rock to bottom 

knocked clear out my axis

watched just three birds grace the cloud with their dance

After hail

After hawk talons 

After drought, the affliction of fever in

Ten thousand scorching suns

And then, on their flight back

What felt like punctured lung,

the dead tree smoking a hole clear through their conscience 

What could hurt more than this?

To know only three came back among millions.

I heard their wailing song and said nothing

But I am standing before you now;

If no one else will say it, I will:

I am sorry the terrors you have suffered 

Lay your tired head in my lap my love.

about// for you, who survive unspeakable evils 

postscript: quotation reference from Robert Frost's poem Lodged

Blood and Flesh

daughter of thunder · Blood and Flesh

Will yours still want to graze my lips when the fangs glare livid?

Hold my hand when these claws come out of their slumber?

If an apocalypse is nothing more than a revealing of truth,

Imagine how many little boys were slaughtered 

upon learning what I have been trying to tell you all along:

this rage was not an accident,

 a mere whoopsy-daisy coincidence of a cluster 

created at random.

A child can comprehend the concept of cause and consequence 

But leave a grown man alone to beat on his beloved?

And some remain bewildered at her becoming.

Well, what could we expect

when instead of heart she grew spine?

It is a practiced thing this thorn in the flesh

I fear for the flesh 

what the thorn begets.

Postscript// You can appreciate a woman being disgusted by cowardice can’t you? I'm exhausted.

Sibling Rivalry

daughter of thunder · Sibling Rivalry

What good could it do—

 holding sway, relinquishing rule—

at a time like this?

As if the mountain peaked and obliterated 

himself.

No, but it was the flick of God’s golden wrist.

(And who would that make me

to render God wicked?)

A fine wine turned to water as 

king after fallen king trip over his own crown.

How many psalms I have ached to spawn!

Oh, to spew sunsets reflected on salt-peppered coastlines, 

A butterfly’s violent rupture into rapture,

Puppies

All the while the outcry in Gaza, a malignant mental knot—

A young girl’s unraveling braid is pulled by her brother 

a relentless bickering 

Over who got more cheddar on their grilled cheese.

Poppa, furious at their unwillingness to relinquish 

Who really put bread on the table.

One of these days I’m going to sing sunshine out my hindquarters 

Boom fireworks like fireflies on a summer night.

On this night though?

This inkblack eve dripping virulent dew

across an entire planet?

I hold my palms upward cradling

my heart broken but beating (even still),

 an offering.

Post// “I’ve seen what happens to the wicked and proud when they decide to try and take on the throne for the crown”- Brand New